My Beastie!

Writing about things that frighten us kinda makes you wonder if people will judge you for what you are afraid of. There are frightening moments all around us all the time. Just some things are more scary to one person then they could be to everybody else.
I am scared of a few things. I ain't a real big scaredy cat either, I just think a lot about the future, and working with elderly folk, I get a new view about things by listening to their stories and seeing what happens to them day by day. Each day a drastic change could happen or may have happened to the residents. This makes me realize how short life really is, and ever single moment is important to remember.
My major fears are that one day I will be incapable of taking care of myself, lose my memory, and thinking people care when they really don't. Then while I am on my final days, I will be gone and no one will notice and life goes on without a single tear shed for me. It is not death that frightens me, its what I think could happen to me when he comes knocking on my door and then takes me away.
- Nowadays you see plenty of people who can't remember little details, dates things are due, or some one's birthday, so forgetting things like that isn't really a big deal, the things I would hate to forget is my entire past, a recent conversation, and/ or something that just happened and everybody knows it happened but you.
- Not being able to care for yourself after doing it for so many years makes you feel as if you are less of a human than those who take care of you or family that comes to visit you. People are stubborn and will try to continue to attempt the things they can't do just because the have hope they can still do them, then they get hurt.
- Everybody has people who care, well then you have doubts that they just pretend to care and then you feel awful about yourself. We always no for sure our family will care, but what about your friends? Do they truly care or just keep you around to use your money, car, or get to know your other friends because they are interested in them? I have my doubts about people so I go on wondering if they care and think about how they could react if I was to die or get severely hurt. Would they be there for me or my family for comfort?
Working around the man, Death, makes you wonder about how you have lived your life. Have you lived your life to the fullest? Just don't care what people think, you are who you are, they are just gonna have to deal with it! I can tell you that one thing is for sure, Death is not the scariest thing to me.